Stress.

It seems like lately it’s been what’s taking over my life, the worst part is I’m so ignorant when it comes to it.  No matter what problems people have I always seem to think mine are the worse and their far from it.  It’s just school has me in such a rut and I’m trying so hard to not become consumed by it and I can’t help but let it happen.  There hasn’t been a night before 3 am this week and there won’t be for a while now.  I can’t wait to be back at home and have the snow, and have home cooked food once again.  I swear I won’t even complain if my mom makes pork chops one night for dinner.  I miss having stupid fights with my brother and sitting around talking about everything with my dad.  I know it’s a short 2 weeks until I’m finally all around that again but I do miss it.  I feel like a baby when all I want is my home bed, Ol’ Bear, an old  CD and a Tim Horton’s tea with two milk and two sugar.

Certain things are keeping me sane currently:

My boyfriend is one for sure.  It was so nice to get out of my room tonight and just lay around his watching the curling match and eating pizza.  It’s been three months and I’m beyond content.  It’s like being a step above being best friends.   I like holding hands and hugging for a few seconds longer then you would a normal person.  I like kissing and watching his reactions to snowfalls in my town.  I like when we have nothing to say so we send a smile or a heart and it reminds me to chill the fuck out for a few seconds and think about the important things.

Pokemon.  It’s lame and silly but those breaks are exactly what I need sometimes.  I just whip out my DS for half an hour and the difference it makes is astonishing.  It helps me wind down after working on projects for hours straight.

Glee. It’s one show a week I look forward to and it gives me something to have to look forward to after my meetings on Tuesdays.

Pogo.  I love that my mom and me have it and have friendly competitions to finish our weekly challenges even though lately she’s been the one finishing mine for me.

The knowledge I get to go home soon.  I currently don’t feel safe here.  There were two gun robberies at a bus stop outside my school this week.  It’s not right for someone to not feel safe in a building they live in.  I don’t even like going pee in the middle of the night because I’m petrified someone is going to be hiding out in the bathroom to attack me.  It’s completely unrealistic but I think I just have a fear of people taking advantage of me.

Needless to say I’m looking forward to the next two weeks flying by quickly.  I want my fishies.  I want my bed and I want my family.  All I want for Christmas is my peace and quiet, sleep, and my family.

 

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